At some point in my year on the Blyth, we changed half the crew. We had
specifically asked for Cantonese crew, because the crew that remained
were Cantonese, less chance of fighting. The relief crew that arrived
was from Shanghai, and looked like trouble right from the start.
One of them, a young guy well over 6 foot, was the commissar and let us know it immediately. He started causing trouble, threatening the rest of the crew, especially the cantonese crew and engineer officers. We knew it was going on because the english electrician's cabin was aft and it was my habit to help him sink a bottle of brandy after evening dinner.
Until then the Captain, a foodie, had introduced a regime whereby some of the engineers were allowed to knock off watch for the weekend. In return they cooked all the meals throughout the weekend. The chief and 2nd engineer took their place on watch. Even after the new crew had arrived this arrangement continued and we were blessed with 8 course Cantonese and Shanghai cuisine of the first order.
However, very soon we started to detect a reluctance to continue the practice. After some investigation the bosun told us the truth, the young pup had bambozzled and bullied the whole crew, including the engineers into refusing to continue the practice. When confronted he sneered in our face and said he did not know anything about it.
Next day the bosun's assistant came running up to me, asking for my help as medical officer on the ship. He looked a mess, battered face and hands, I thought he wanted my help, but no, it was the bosun who needed my help. Well, the bosun, another elderly gentleman, was a complete mess. Our commissar had beaten him up and administered the coup de grace by breaking one of the dining room chairs over his head. As I tried to carry the bosun up to the hospital in the midship accomodation block the bully tried to stop me but I just kept moving. Got him up to hospital and started administering pain killers and washing his wounds.
Meanwhile Captain, Chief engineer and chief officer are having a conference as to what to do. Engine stops, vessel starts to drift. Everybody outside, Chief on way to engineroom. However, the sight that greets us is the whole chinese crew, engineer officers and crew members lined up along the forward bulkhead of the aft accomodation and the brave thug standing in front of them with a long handled fire axe in his hands.
At this point I need to introduce our chief officer, ex Hull trawlerman who had gained MN foreign going certificates and switched to the bigger merchant navy ships. Thickset, about 5' 8", not a big man but as hard as trawler men the world over. He took it all in and looked over his shoulder at the Captain, Chief and myself, "who's with me" he said. My anger at the treatment of the old bosun got the better of my good sense. We started down the steel gangway that ran from midships to the poopdeck, leaving Captain and Chief behind. As we got closer and closer I could see most of the crew were like rabbits caught in a cars headlights, they were as frightened as I was. Young thug by this time had two hands on axe and holding it aloft. Chief officer still walking steadily towards him. When we were about two yards away yer bully cuts and runs with chief officer after him. Crew and yours truly breathe collective sigh of relief. Chief catches our thug, beats him up and we swop the bosun for him in hospital as the hospital also doubles as a lockup. Stays there until we get him off ship at next port.
Interestingly, one of the engineers the thug had hit with a stillson wrench, nearly blinding him, had an uncle in the Hongkong immigration department. Well, the rumour that circulated on board ship was that uncle had been informed. Our young thug arrived at Hongkong airport but was never seen again.
Did I
mention that I had a quick temper? My first trip on the company cadet
ship (no crew/able seamen, just cadets) the chief officer had asked me
three times to get my hair cut, finally put me on "field days" until I
got it cut. "Field" days are up to 18 hour days on really shitty jobs.
Lost the plot, went ashore first opportunity in West Africa, told the
local barber to give me a Mohican. Despite a little cultural difficulty
in visualising what the strange white boy with the big lugs wanted he
duly gave me a pretty good approximation to a "Mohican". Back to ship,
pretty pleased with myself, chief officer has an apoplectic fit and
takes me straight to captain. Midshipman carpeted and entered into the
official logbook of ship, bit like a police caution! Telegrams must have
been sent to HQ, because, before the ship has crossed the Bar in
Liverpool midshipman's presence is required at India Buildings, HQ
central as they say.
Now the man in charge of Elder Dempster cadets, a Capt.Smallwood RN retd , was the same man who had so graciously accepted this unpromising material into this great shipping line in the first place. His office was at the end of a very long corridor, an open office which housed all the hundreds of secretarial staff , pretty girls after whom we cadets lusted. The bush telegraph had done its business and it was to hushed and amused stares that I stumbled my way to Capt. Smallwood's office.
The good mans clipped and succinct demolition of my character culminated in the immortal phrase "midshipman, you will never make anything but a dammed foc'le hand". A humbler cadet stumbled out of his office and tried and failed to navigate the secretarial office with some dignity. Circa 67-68
Now the man in charge of Elder Dempster cadets, a Capt.Smallwood RN retd , was the same man who had so graciously accepted this unpromising material into this great shipping line in the first place. His office was at the end of a very long corridor, an open office which housed all the hundreds of secretarial staff , pretty girls after whom we cadets lusted. The bush telegraph had done its business and it was to hushed and amused stares that I stumbled my way to Capt. Smallwood's office.
The good mans clipped and succinct demolition of my character culminated in the immortal phrase "midshipman, you will never make anything but a dammed foc'le hand". A humbler cadet stumbled out of his office and tried and failed to navigate the secretarial office with some dignity. Circa 67-68